I have been asking this question to myself and others for a while now: Why is the concept of happiness on such a throne? Why are we chasing it, searching for it, and saying we are in alignment when we experience it? Why is it that everyone wants to sit with this ‘best kid in class’?
I have seen, spoken, embraced, loved, held and witnessed so many people over the years who experienced they were broken, because they didn’t experience happiness on a daily base.
They thought something was wrong with them, felt left out and not meeting standards. They were often in a constant pursue of it and it made them feel even more defect because of it. As if they would be top students of life when they achieved it and held the position, but were miserably failing if they didn’t.
I am seriously appalled at times how happiness is the one destination we are told in so many ways we must reach in this life. And how we are being seduced, confronted and even bullied with a shitload of meme’s, quotes and courses that are calling us to get in that place and stay there. Can you imagine the feels when you are in a fucked up place (and most of us are one time or another) and you get one across the lips by someone saying that ‘happiness is a choice’? I bet you can.
I often fantasize about a world where sadness, anger, happiness, joy and not-knowing are the new sexy. Where curiousity about life in all it’s light AND dark colours is what is the hottest thing to experience. Where all of these states of being get a throne. And not one is better than the other, just merely a part of the whole.
Hi, my name is Sharona and I am a recovering happiness addict. I used to pretend I was okay, when behind my smile I was pulling my hair out of my head and beating myself up for not being mentally strong enough to hold up the happiness ideal. It made me foggy, tired and very lonely at times. In the past years I have been introduced to the concept of being 100% alive. With EVERYTHING that comes with it. I experienced that happiness is one of the 1598 ways of being (I am a woman. I love dem feels and emotions.) in this human experience. I lowered the bar of chasing happiness as an ideal. And I feel a much greater sense of liberation and freedom by meeting up and acknowledging each state as it comes. Yes, I still get into my old habit sometimes. Judging my state of being and wanting happiness. And that is okay. I am aware.
I’ve said it before and I am saying it again: We humans have come equiped with a way of channeling emotions that heal, relieve and help our souls expand. We get to travel through the layercake that is life. Please don’t unpack and live in one of the layers. Dare to eat your way through that glorious mess.
Happiness, this is no longer a solo performance. Join the choir.