In the void where worlds collide, chaos rules and the void is pregnant with creation, I'm sitting and letting Her work through me. Unprecedented fear, purging of ancestral pain, and liberation from a lifetime of walls I put up for myself, I am melting with this energy larger than life. Walking through the doors that are scars, hidden memories of my youth, entering portals through old stories that are being offered to me by my ancestors. Although it sounds romantic from the outside, the level of transformation is eating me with skin and bones and is confusing to my logical mind in so many ways.
And beneath these layers of transformation, there is this connection to home. Stronger than ever. A home where communication is in colours, forms, feelings and energetic vibrations. Unstructured to my human mind, but deeply synchronized and right to my soul's deeper knowing.
I no longer just see the world, I feel a place beyond it rattling my bones, buzzing through my cells, and humming through me like a grand otherworldly presence is swallowing me whole.
A new incarnation of me is on the threshold of coming through. I'm changing. Again. I thought after cycles of evolution in the last couple of years I knew who I was, only to remember once again that this is a journey of a lifetime.
I am what my Home, Spirit, The Mother needs me to be. I trust my grandest and most wise deeper and higher self to know who I need to in each moment. And that might change every once in a while. And that might make me or others comfortable for a bit. It means continually willing to be open to the deepest, most highest form of creation. Willingness to let go of structures, people, identities, and approval ever so often. Ability to step aside and let the non-sensical, wildly creative, cosmic knowledge beyond everything I understand to move through me.